Caring for Carers with Self-Compassion
Module Four:
Working with Difficult Emotions and Exploring Gratitude
Welcome back to our final Module. In this module there are two practices for you to try. The first one is a Loving Kindness Meditation which addresses difficulties you may encounter in life.
Watch the video to the right to understand more about training the mind to be more loving and compassionate especially when you're facing difficulty.
Loving Kindness for Difficult Emotions
I hope you'll enjoy this Loving Kindness for Difficult Emotions practice. The Loving Kindness practices are some of my most treasured practices – they have had a powerful effect on my life. I don’t know whether it will be one of your favourites but give it a try a few times and see what happens
Play the audio below:
Settling and Reflection
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Please take a moment to settle and reflect on what you just experienced.
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So how that was practice for you?
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What did you notice? What did you feel?
Gratitude, Joy & Appreciation
In your caring role, caring for someone with a life limiting or palliative diagnosis, you are exposed to intense suffering… physical, emotional, mental and spiritual suffering in a way that many others aren’t.
In order to support yourself as you face this pain and difficulty it can be helpful to practice gratitude and appreciation for all the good things that there maybe in your life (big and small) even as you go through such a difficult time.
Research has found that people who practice gratitude regularly can reduce the impact of daily stress, have lower blood pressure, better immunity and a generally improved mood.
When you’re caught in a cycle of despair you can help to step out of it by consciously calling to mind all that is positive and life-affirming in your present situation, even if it seems that there is very little to be grateful for.
So, in this meditation we are deliberately cultivating gratitude and thankfulness. Play the audio file on the right …
“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses”
Alphonse Karr, A Tour Round My Garden
Click on the link below to play the Gratitude Meditation
Settling and Reflection
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How do you feel now compared to 10 minutes ago?
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What did you notice? What did you feel?
The Gratitude meditation completes all the formal practices in iCare. But before you finish I thought you might like some suggestions for taking your mindfulness and self-compassion journey further.
If you click on the Resources 2019 link to the right you will be able to open a list of books, web sites and other training you could take if you would like to know more about mindfulness and self-compassion.
Suggestions for Practice for the
next 7 days and beyond:
You now have quite a wide range of practices to choose from. Do experiment to find practices that speak to you.
You may find over time that a practice that you initially resisted is now something that really calls to you. So, do go back to other practices from time to time.
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For the next week just to develop more familiarity with the practices that we covered in this module try and practice the Loving Kindness for Difficult Times and the Gratitude Meditation as well as any other practice that calls to you.
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Do savour the small things in life
Take a pause and notice the sights, sounds and people and animals around you. Really take in, absorb all that you can sense.
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At the very least keep on asking yourself ‘What do I need right now?’ Or ‘What’s the kindest thing I can do for myself right now?’
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Allow yourself to be kinder to yourself
Remember you’re not being selfish, you are turning towards yourself in the midst of difficulty and taking care of yourself and in doing that you are building your inner resources and resilience to cope with what life is throwing at you.
Final Steps
I so appreciate your time and effort in participating in this research. Thank you. Your feedback and comments will help influence how best to support other carers who find themselves in a similar caring role in the future.
In around two weeks’ time I will send you a link to a short questionnaire and to the Self-compassion Scale and the Depression, Anxiety and Stress Scales which you completed before you started iCare.
These are all essential parts of my research – I really want to hear what you have to say about iCare, both good and bad.
Don’t forget to complete the Module Four feedback questions – this is so helpful for my research. You will find it below.